Original Logo

Nothing To See Here, Move Along

August 11th, 2005

The Ten Phases of Singlespeeding

I wish this was mine, but the credit must go to Shaggy. Rather fetching there in his Paolo Pezzo top. Anyway, here goes…

1 - Build your first singlespeed

inspired by others riding SS, you either convert an old bike or buy an entry level SS to get the flavor.. Ride it, ***** about how hard it is getting up the hills, think about where to ride next. Lather, rinse and repeat…

2- Upgrade madness

the weight weenie / blinglespeed side takes over and you suddenly develop a need to upgrade. A combination of an empty bank account, an upset significant other or a weight weenie part failure ensues. You have parts shipped to work, so the wife won’t see the bike parts you ordered. You start looking for ideas (like the MTBR SS forum) to further your obsession of the perfect SS.

3 - Gear ratios

your brain becomes obsessed with determining the optimum gear ratio for the upcoming race or given terrain. You temporarily lose focus on just riding and being one with your bike. Your library of forks, chain rings and cogs/cassettes starts to rival the selection at Supergo or Webcyclery.

4 - Realization

the entry level SS no longer is good enough. You convince yourself you need a better bike — custom, SS specific, whatever…

5 - Purism

you realize that you’re almost exclusively riding your SS. Your other bikes are collecting dust. Under your breath, you sometimes mock others riding gears and work your butt off to one-up them. You use your SS as a tool to brag or as an excuse / handicap (I geared too stiff for the course…) Start hating RockShox and Shimano just on principle, and start thinking rigid forks and DH tires are the better setup.

6 - Laziness

you go out and upgrade to a “proper” SS. Now that you it, the upgrade and gear ratio obsessions are fulfilled. You get lazy, and start trashing your bike without taking care of it. You forget about checking tire pressures, chain tension, broken teeth and don’t even consider about the consequences. A wonderful delusion, until the bike leaves you stranded 5 miles from your car, and your cell phone has no signal deep in the woods…

7 - Heresy

ride your SS so much, that when you ride your geared bike, you miss your SS. You take it one step further and actually sell off the geared bike(s) that you previously couldn’t live without.

8 - Fight club

start putting beer in your water bottles, grow some unusual facial hair (for the men), dress like a freak, and acquire the attitude that you don’t give a **** about racing or beating the gearies. Riding a pink colored bike frame or wearing orange socks with your Birkenstocks to a bar after the ride doesn’t even click to you as being strange.

9 (optional) - Scorching

as if SS’ing isn’t fringe enough, start thinking http://www.63xc.com is an interesting alternative. Give it a go, maybe even get hooked.

10 - Approach martyrdom

actually leave the clique by riding so much that few buddies can keep up with you. You become one with your bike. You simultaneously learn a level of humbleness and let your results speak for themselves.

One Response to “The Ten Phases of Singlespeeding”

  1. surlysimon Says:

    Nick
    nice but instead of selling geared bikes isn’t it more comon to start converting all of them to SS regardless of suitibility? i started with that little dip of the toe and now i am turning my wife’s bikes into SS (just the one, she has more restraint than i do) i have even toyed with turning our MTB tandem into a SS, i need help!!

Leave a Reply

site feeds

RSS Feed - Entries (entries)

RSS Feed - Comments (comments)

categories

Our random meanderings get stuffed into one - or more! - of the following categories.

things we ride

Actually we‚re lying about the Maverick since some low-life stole it.

photos

My photos on flickr. Get your badge at bighugelabs.com/flickr

meta>>data

A dogs dinner of links to stuff that we have arranged in an apparently random manner, though I assure you it made sense at the time.

Creative Commons License

GeoURL

Powered by PHP

Spam Karma 2

web shit

Get Firefox!

You know it makes sense.

Valid XHTML 1.0 Transitional

Valid CSS!

[Valid RSS]

Level Triple-A conformance icon, 
          W3C-WAI Web Content Accessibility Guidelines 1.0

Page Strength SEO Tool - SEOmoz.org

search 32sixteen

search the web

Google

tape time

The things we listen to are occasionally logged on Last.fm

Now Playing

New! iPod updating courtesy of iScrobbler.

It doesn't update from the wheels of steel though :-)

Remember kids, vinyl can't carry Digital Rights Management.

LastFM

people are people

English Blog Directory.

other places to go

in no particular order...

Vale of Lune Harriers

toilet material

For all that we like the up-to-the minute offerings of the web there‚s nothing like a proper badly photocopied A5 fanzine or a glossily printed proper magazine to keep you occupied on the throne. Here, in no particular order, is our material of choice.

Singletrack
Singletrack

The Outcast
The Outcast

Dirt Rag
Dirt Rag

Bike
Bike

our images

In the UK as we give away our civil liberties in the name of freedom it might be handy to be aware of Photographers Rights.

Don’t let The Man stop you shooting.

www.flickr.com
This is a Flickr badge showing photos in a set called Cycling.
Make your own badge here.

flickr score: 2968

race results

If anyone has a full set of NEMBA results (that‚s North of England for you colonial types) then please forward them.

cycling activism

sometimes you just gotta take action, or at least be able to get our hands on the FACTS